Mar 29 AT 2:33 PM Dustin Earley 28 Comments

CrApp of the Week: The World’s Hardest Game sucks. Period. So shut up.

World's Hardest Game

So here I sit. Absolutely fuming mad. Because of one stupid game that looks and sounds like garbage. Really? The World’s Hardest Game? It’s not even hard in a fun way. It’s hard because it’s impossible to play on a small touchscreen. It makes me want to punch Joustin’ Beaver in the face (I suppose I want to do that anyway). I hate it.

The game sounds simple enough (“You are RED square, avoid the BLUE circles and collect Yellow circles. Once you have collected all the yellow circles move to GREEN beacon to complete the level.”), but it’s meant to be challenging. I get that, I really do, but this game was not meant to be played on a touchscreen. I don’t exactly have pencil thin digits, but it’s not like I have Shaq hands. I can’t even see what I’m supposed to be doing once I put my finger on it. And the graphics suck so bad, and there’s such a small area to move around in, and you can’t zoom in, and annoying techno is assaulting my eardrums, and my dog has to go outside, and my text message noise won’t quit going off, and my girlfriend wants to know what I want for dinner, and I have no freaking idea, and next thing you know, my phone is on the other side of the room. Because I threw it against the wall. And showed it who’s boss.

I hated this game when it was in the Flash portal on Newgrounds, and I hate it even more now. You might think at this point that the game isn’t actually all that bad, and I just have a personal vendetta against it. Just play it for yourself.

 

Have a fantastically terrible Android CrApp you’d like to see covered? Let us know in the comments below.

Dustin Earley: Tech enthusiast; avid gamer; all around jolly guy.

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